Archive for worship

Soon and very soon, we’re going to see the King

It has been a long day. As I was getting in to the shower today, I started thinking that tomorrow is going to be the last time I get to see my dad. It has weighed on me all day. I can’t think of all the things I need to say to him. He sleeps all day so it’s not like he will hear them but still there are things I need to say. We are going back after dinner tonight so hopefully he will talk with us. Then there is tomorrow. I don’t know how I will fare on the flight back home. Unless God does some of His stuff, dad will be gone in the next two weeks.

I want to try and go down to the beach tonight to spend some time alone with God but at the same time I want to be here to comfort my mom. I guess God will show me what He wants me to do when the time comes.


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We’re a team, me and God

Psalm 150:6

Let everything that has breath praise the LORD. Praise the LORD!

I am finding that the days just run together lately. My mind has been consumed with all of the “What if’s” that come with a dying relative and decisions that had to be made with putting Dad into Hospice care. I know we made the right choice because it is what he wanted to happen. My mind has just been flooded with all the questions. I tried to go down to the beach last night to clear my head but it was raining and the wind was really coming off the water too hard for me to stay. The water was very rough and pounded the beach very hard. I could relate to the sand in that moment, pounded and tossed around landing in a strange place then for a few moments, peace, and then a new wave bringing more water down on my head. Tonight I headed down there again. The weather was great but the ocean was pretty rough. I gazed out at the horizon, panning around the beauty of God’s creation. At that moment, I found myself worshiping. God of wonders, beyond our galaxy, You ARE Holy. In that place, God gave me a peace in my heart. I know that the next days are going to be some of the most challenging as Dad comes to his end but I believe that if I keep my focus on Jesus through this time, it will be easier.

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What’s going on

Not a question, as in Marvin Gaye’s great song but more of what has been happening in my world lately.

My dad gave us a scare. He got dehydrated and had to be taken to the ER. The radiation he had made it very painful for him to swallow so he wasn’t always taking his meds. The doctors were able to insert a pic line so they could hydrate him as well as a feeding tube so he could get some nourishment. The anti-biotics they have him on as well as getting food have started having positive effects. He has started participating in his PT and is also coming around mentally. Thank you all who have been praying for him. It is working and he has a long way to go in his recovery so please keep him before the Lord.

I have been pretty busy myself. I started teaching myself the Perl programming language and I think I overloaded my brain. I am almost certain there was smoke coming from my ears. I set up an account of Facebook and have been able to get in touch with some old friends. Tomorrow I am taking my Father-in-law golfing because I will be down helping out with my Dad next weekend when his birthday rolls around. I have also been thinking a lot about what Cornerstone needs to do to start growing more in worship. I think we are being called to step out of our comfort zones and see where God leads us.

PS- I got the book for my next class, it is CSI135. UNIX/Linux with some scripting thrown in. The book is “A Practical guide to Ubuntu Linux” I really would have thought that they would have used more of a Server Class OS like RHEL/CentOS, SLES, Open Solaris or maybe even BSD. The class will be pretty easy except for the scripting. Everything else in the book I do on a daily basis.

PPS- I have to go rest up for golf tomorrow. I will post again soon.

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I’ll take Jesus over a bookie anyday

Friday the 4th of July, I went golfing with my father-in-law and Alistair the youth intern at our church.  It was an extremely hot day and we got held up about an hour or so so it took us a little over 5 hours for 18 holes.  LeAnn and my mother-in-law picked us up and we went and got a cold drink and an ice cream cone.  We decided to go to the grocery and pick up something for dinner before heading out for the fireworks.  My father-in-law wanted to go home and shower but I suggested that we just stop since it was on the way.  Walking back out to the car, I looked across the parking lot and who do I see but my oldest brother. I have seen him once in the last 7 years and here he was vacationing the same place we were.  It was cool to be able to introduce him to my in-laws and Alistair. The coolest part though was I think that God was showing me just how big He is and also that all things are in His control.  There are over 6 Billion people in the world. There are over 300 Million people in the United States of America. There are over 9 Million people in North Carolina.  Guess whose car we were parked next to in the parking lot?  That is right, my brother…. Anyone good at making odd’s or statistics?

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This is your life

yesterday is a wrinkle on your forehead
yesterday is a promise that you’ve broken
don’t close your eyes, don’t close your eyes
this is your life and today is all you’ve got now
yeah, and today is all you’ll ever have
don’t close your eyes
don’t close your eyes
this is your life, are you who you want to be
this is your life, are you who you want to be

The above text is from Switchfoot’s song “This is your life”.  I heard it while I was driving home from my Thursday night small group. I have heard the song several times but this time, I thought about it in a new way. Here is how I usually think about it-

Yesterday is a wrinkle on your forehead

– Your past is part of who you are

Yesterday is a promise that you’ve broken

– in the past you’ve had some failures

Don’t close your eyes

– Don’t be discouraged

This is your life, and today is all you have now

-We are not promised tomorrow, get it done today

This is your life, are you who you want to be

– Are you reaching your fullest potential

Thursday night, I thought of it in the context of worship. I began to think about how I see people holding back in worship. I can almost see the inner struggle as I look around the room.  Why is it that we can be afraid to let out our deepest adoration?  I have been there myself at times. Standing in a sea of people wanting to raise my hands or jump up and down, or get down on my knees and then I feel all the eyes in the room starring at me so I hold it all in.

This is your life, are you who you want to be? – Worship is your life, are you worshiping with all of who you are? Are you pouring out all of who you are? If not, why not?  God certainly deserves it. Don’t look at the rest of the room.  Look to the cross, look to the King. Pour out all of who you are!

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